Say What You Mean

Say what you mean. Why do we hint at what we want or dance around issues and never come to the point? Is it to avoid confrontation? Is it because we are too nice? Because we are Canadian, eh?
I was recently describing a situation to a group of colleagues and pointed out that I was not able to convince someone to do a certain thing.
“Did you ask him/her to?” someone said to me. I said I suggested it.
“So, you hinted at it?” someone else said.
“Well, more than a hint” I said, “I offered my opinion on what I thought was the best route to take.”
“And that route was agreed?”
“No.”
“Then you were not clear on what you wanted done.”
In any relationship it needs to be clear what is to be done. The customer/supplier, the staff/supervisor, the parent/child. Some of these relationships are hierarchical, some familial, and they all require work. To be clear and concise and still get to a point where something gets done, either by a directive or perhaps by agreement or compromise, both parties need to work at it.
I needed to go into this discussion with a clear objective of what I wanted and why, and to be prepared to support my position and move from it if there were convincing arguments. I needed to ask more questions and be clearer with my statements. I need to do more work, to be prepared, and do less dancing.